Shackles of Consent

[manfredvijars]

Shackles of Consent
(c) Manfred Vijars - May 2007

A graceful bird with her wings clipped will suffer in severe
constraint upon the ground her frightened eyes will ooze in fear.
Persistently she'll try to fly knowing once she soars
she'll be fulfilled - but all she does is crashes into doors.

In spite of your bravado, furtive glances can't disguise
the bracings of defence that flicker through embattled eyes
I hear your guarded laughter breaking free sometimes - unbound;
but quickly checked - back in control whenever he's around.

Fresh-faced and pretty you once were and happy in your marriage;
you’re now embattled beauty in felicity's miscarriage.   
The love you had and promises you shared that made you whole
became the "ties that bind". They're now the shackles of your soul.

Bruises heal but words cut deep. Again and then again
each piercing slash will find it's mark. Result is morbid pain.   
You question your self worth but you'll deny that you're abused.
Results of love - those tender babes, are cowering confused.

Your spirit has been battered but remains unbroken yet.
You're keen and quite defensive - you can recognise a threat.
The constant warfare keeps you sharp and on your toes to please
for sake of peace. Now where's that mask - allay your friend's unease.

Your friends care and reach for you through curtains of convention -
unsure of how to broach your pain; the real pain through your tension.
They understand you're saving face yet see through your beguiling.
We ache in all your suffering and long to see you smiling.
---

[Irene]

Manfred,
What a really touching poem!
Sadly, too many women and children are in the same circumstances, and try so hard to pretend that all is normal.

You sound like you have written this to a friend - if so, I sincerely hope she finds the strength to escape his hold. Certainly, those who have the support of loved ones and good friends have a better chance of doing so.

Well-written

Catchya
IRene

[therese]

manfred, such truth in this write.  i have a friend who was in such a situation.  until finally breaking free of his control.  he had thrown her against a brick wall while pregnant, and she has a lot of pain in her back now because of it.  luckily though she didn't lose the baby.  i hope the girl in question can find the strength to break free....and that karma catches up with him!

[tomchap]

I always get mixed feelings with these situations. Sadness that such should occur, sympathy for the one who is suffering, and anger that a man should selfishly take advantage of physical strength like that. He may be the head of the household, but that comes with responsibility to love, protect and care for his wife. Where there is care and compassion and real concern for the well-being of the partner, the relationship will work harmoniously. And in the best situations, those attributes are working in both directions.

I see the man's role as protector, not persecutor.

Cheers
Tom.

[Bernard de Silva]

G'day Manfred,
                    a piece of well considered and well written social comment...which I suspect likely originated from hurtful personal observation...
                     The really sad aspect of this type of situation is how it impacts upon and scars the young victims...in many cases distorting common logic to later perpetuate the problem...
                                    Bernie.

[manfredvijars]

Thanks for your kind words folks, yes it was a distressing BBQ that I attended on the weekend - couldn't take my eyes off this bloke's Missus (I was discreet of course). My hosts later informed me about the situation, then the Muse kicked in.

Currently in Brissie ads have been running against Spouse Abuse, ironically I picked up the music for Archie Roach's piece "Walking into Doors".

Cheers,

Manfred.

 

[tomchap]

Manfred, we've seen ads like that too here in Tamworth. Some bad things happening in our society.

As an aside, I check my blood pressure every morning, and after reading your poem and experiencing the emotional response, it was up 10 points! -- Back to normal today.  I would be no good as a counselor, I'd get too involved.

Cheers
Tom.